Today is the day...

I went back to the gym. I thought for sure I was having a coronary, but 1 1/2 hours later I am still upright and breathing.

I decided I can't just sit back and put on all the weight I have lost. Although I gave into temptation, I will get better. It is just a matter of getting back into the swing of things and getting my willpower back.

I felt left out at work. Someone came into the room and another left, making two people who left the room and closed the door behind them to go giggle with the director.

I sat back and asked myself how am I ever going to get ahead at work? I hardly ever ask for favors, I work my tail off, and am not even looked at for greater responsibilities. What more can I do?

I realized I miss my best friend and her very beautiful state. I miss her kids too.

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This is what I ate today:

B-Yogurt and oat bran
S-Bagelful
L-Enchiladas
S-Grapefruit cup
S-Twix bar
D-Shepherds pie and 2 biscuits

Okay, so I can tell I need to cut down on my portions, and definitely need to cut chocolate out of my DAILY diet. I will, it is going to take time, but I will.

I'm exhausted, just wanted to check in.

Love ya,
Jenn

Happy birthday honey girl. I am fine. I hope you had a really great day. I slept none last night and my phone is in the car. I am going to just go to bed but if you need me call my house. I hope you had the best bday you could have hoped for!

Sick....

Crys,

I hope that you are doing better and that you've been able to get rid of that nasty migraine. I know when I get them they can last for 2 days, so I am hoping that this is not the case. I hope that Gab and Darren are all doing ok as well.

Well, for the first time I am caught up on my homework for school! Ok, minus one discussion I have to answer in science.

This is what I ate today:

B-English muffin with butter and jelly
S-No
L-Oven roasted chicken, and mashed potates and a small piece of pizza (SO DIDNT NEED IT!)
S-No
D-Grilled boneless pork chops, rice, and beans

I have drank almost 2 liters today, but I nixed at least 1 litre by drinking a large Cafe breve with hazelnut flavoring, but instead of whole milk I got it with soy, and it was delicious!

I have been doing ok on my eating; during the day. I notice at night that I am grabbing 1/2 a bagel or something at night around 11 while I am doing homework, and like last night I had Jeff get me a bag of Peanut M&M's, I so didn't need those. So, needless to say, I weighed in the other day 215.5, but I haven't checked in recently.

I have to say that I am really disgusted with the way I look right now. For some reason my belly seems to be swollen all the time. I know that while I was working out, I weighed the same, but I looked soooo much better. I owe them money and am going to pay it when I get paid, and I am going to renew my membership. I am hoping that when I get done with the Academy in November I will be able to get to it more regularly. I have to, my health and my mental state depends on it. I know that I should probably stop being lazy and walk the kids to school in the mornings. It is cooling off, so I would be comfortable walking.

Speaking of weather it was so cool and fantatic today. If it got above 72 we were doing good, and then to top it off the wind was blowing and it was marvelous. I thought back to when I was there, and how cool it was all the time. So, putting it into perspective you guys were what 50ish today?

I am still sick...I hate the fact that I can't breath correctly, that is a horrible feeling to feel like you are drowning. I am hoping that this will soon be passing, I am due to be back at work on Friday.

I am sooo tired, I have been doing about 4-5 loads of laundry a day, and am not caught up. It seems that when I think I have it under control, I turn around and the hamper is overflowing again. ARGH! Oh, well at least it's not as bad as it usually is. I am proud though because for 2 nights I have cooked dinner and all meals at home. I am bound and determined to stay at home and eat. It will save us so much money, I mean if we go somewhere like Chilis it is an easy $70, at a fast food restaurant an easy $40. Take that and times it by about 5-8 times a month and we are talking serious cash.

So, I told you this last night, but because of the headache I don't know if you will remember. Jeff has surgery on the 22nd, I am taking off the 23rd to be sure that he is ok. I may not get to you as often as I would like, but we will see, I will try my hardest.

Okay, so Caleb has expanded his vocabulary by so much in such a short period of time, he still pales in comparison to Gab, but he is on his way up.

-cup
-cat
-cookie
-cracker
-hi
-bye
-go
-oh no
-uh oh
-cook
-apple
-apple juice
-bop bop
-no

And there are so many more I can't keep up with it. He is doing so well, I just hope it keeps up. I have noticed that he has started repeating after us when he hears a new word, then once he knows it he won't mimic any more. Also, he has a liking to the hard c sound, so I go with that. I do of course try and get him to say so much more, but he learns those words the fastest.

He did the cutest thing today, I was standing cooking lunch and he walked up and grabbed my leg and started patting it. He did the same thing while I was doing dinner, and sitting down after we had gotten done eating. So, he is starting to self-initate affection. It is so amazing to feel his little head and hands against my leg.

Alright girl, I have said enough I think. I am tired, and I am going to sit down with a hot cup of tea, and begin all my science homework for next week so I am trying not to scramble through the week. I miss you and the kids dearly and am working on getting us up there, just be patient with me. I truly believe that is where I belong, and meeting you and coming to see you was my proof. I will talk with Jeff more about getting up there another time, all of us. I think they will enjoy it.

Talk to you later and love you always.
Jenn

checking in real fast

Hey gilr! I have to take a minute to post but I am having this headache control my life right now and even though I took a pain pill it was so bad I still feel it so I know that it is really out of control.

I think that I have been doing okay with my food but I have not been all that strict with having candy. I dont know what it is but I have wanted sour stuff all the time and it must be like sugar withdrawls or something so I have to watch how much candy I am eating and I am not normally a condy eatier so I got to figure it out.

ANyway I miss you alot but cant think or see. I am gonna look up migranes and then go to bed.

Love ya

C

Adam & Aimee

CRYSTAL....ADAM POSTED!!!! AFTER ALMOST 2 MO NTHS HE POSTED! CHECK IT OUT...SAD, BUT GREAT TO HEAR FROM THEM.

THERE IS A POST BELOW THIS ONE!

Checking in

Hey girl, just wanted to post a couple of things real fast.

One, I saw the pic of gab trying to get under the gate, that is so funny. She is such a dare devil! But oh so cute. I'm glad that you feel more safe letting her run around up stairs, it gives you a little bit of freedom to! Not having to keep running after her, you can complete your tasks a bit easier.

Second, I'm glad to hear that you love school, I knew you would. It's just who you are.

Third I laughed so hard tonight I cried and thought I was going to pee myself! Caleb had eaten some frozen yogurt from a local ice cream shop and he was like a guinea pig on crack! He was dancing around and running, but it was so funny because it was l ike in fast forward except live! It was hilarious!

I ate like crap again otday, but whats new? Since I have been back I have gotten soooo baaaddd. I am back drinking Dr. Pepper all the time, and I don't seem to take the care I need to in order to eat correctly. Although, tonight I made my own spaghetti sauce...that's right my own, not store bought. I don't know if you and John would have liked it but we thought it turned out pretty good. I cooked it for about 4 hours, since I forgot that is what I wanted to make for dinner tonight!

I have to work tonight, I signed up for overtime. I work from midnight until 6 in the morning. I have not slept so this should be interesting.

Caleb has started talking so much more, it is amazing to watch! He can say everyones name, and Gosh I have lost track. I mean he still pales in comparison to Gab, but he is on his way!

Alright girl, I'd better get going on something, I don't know what but I have to leave for work in about 1 1/2 hours so maybe I can do some laundry or something.

You are an amazing friend and I hope that you continue to do ok. I am off tomorrow and will sleep for a little bit, but then the Colts are on and I will be watching, but you come first of course. So, once you are done with church and your gram let me know and we can talk.

Talk to you later.

Love ya,
Jenn

oh yeah....

And you will NEVER lose me inless you tell me to GET LOST!!!!

Love yah always so dont feel bad about me worrying. It was just that I did not know why Jeff would say that and then worried that he meant that you would pull away from me and not that I would pull away from you which would NEVER happen...

SEE JEFF YOUR WRONG WRONG WRONG.....But I forgive yah!

Thanks for sharing your wonder wife with another needy soul.....